I got an email from a reader friend asking for updates on the foster process. We're still waiting again. We had several calls in September, nothing at all in October, and now a few this month. None of the recent cases are emergency placement, and court dates are still a few weeks out. Kind of just wait and see, but assume it's not going to work out for either of the cases. That's our experience on the non rush cases. I hate waiting, but during this wait we've been working in therapy on better preparing Kristopher for the changes that can happen, and at least with our 2 short stays this summer, he knows a little of what to expect. His therapist has given me a lot of good ideas on how to explain things to him to help him better handle behavior issues we may have. The biggest issue I had over the summer placement was him not wanting to interact with the kids much due to behavior issues. They were a bit wild, but they did respond well to time outs. Towards the end it was getting a lot better but he didn't get enough time with them to see that change. I think he understands it better now, and is more open to helping them overcome the changes in rules and homes.
I've also realized that my babysitting schedule was simply not working for us, and have gone to part time. My ultimate goal at this point will be to end that with a longer term placement, and go to just back up help with babysitting. A big part of the reason that the summer placement did not work out was because I had too many of my own to schedule appts for, and no way to include the babysitting kids. I was stranded, and the demands of a child in the system does not mix well with stranded. So now, we are much better able to handle another situation like that one. I still have a feeling that we will have placement before the end of the year, and it sort of scares me because my gut feeling is that it will be days before Christmas. And I'll be having to rush around to find some things so they don't feel left out or skipped over.
Which brings me to that subject. I can not believe that Christmas is coming again so quickly. We have spoiled this kid for years with way too much crap that truly is not needed. It's exciting for a week or 2, then I'd say 75% of it gets shoved in the toybox and forgotten about. So, this year, I'm cutting back. I usually do black friday shopping and a lot of what I'd get him was impulse purchases because of the savings. I'm not going out black friday this year. What I've done this year so far has been to go out and just browse around stores with him and making mental notes of what he really stops and oohhs and ahhhs over. And if he does it the next time we look, it rates high on the list. The biggest idea I have so far is I'd like to go to Michaels or AC Moore and get a bunch of art supplies. He's kind of outgrowing the crayon and crayola stage, and I'd like to get him paint and better longer lasting supplies. And some sketch books. Create a little art box or something cute that it can be kept in and kept safe and I think it will be a big hit. I also have a list of books that I've noticed him really checking out. In one way he is getting easier, because he's into more of hands on stuff, less toys, but at the same time, he's getting into the more expensive and complicated age. If I wouldn't have done this browsing thing with him, he would be a pretty complicated kid to buy for.
He started OT a week ago, and yesterday was his 2nd session. I am starting to like it. They have been giving me some print offs of things we can work with at home, and we have bought some of the "tools" they use with him so we can practice at home. He will be going for at least 3 months, and then will have another assessment to see if he needs longer. I can see it taking that whole 3 months because he's very off on coordination. We took the bike to yesterday's appt and they worked with him on that some. He can pedal if he has a head start but is so dangerous that I can not trust to take him out of our yard. He watches his feet and hands instead of in front of him, and then panics when it's time to stop and runs into whatever is in his path. It's pretty scary. So, they have him starting way back at the beginning. Not allowed to use the pedals till he can "coast" while looking up and taking in what's around him, not watching his feet.
One thing I have noticed is that he gets highly upset with himself (and everyone helping him) when he gets to something that is challenging to him. He's thrown some good fits for them, throwing the ball down, or the shoe for shoe tying...and even pushed the bike away yesterday when he got mad. He just gives up. They are awesome with handling those fits, where I am not. So that helps me a lot. They help him through that harder stuff, and then I just push him to keep practicing at home after he knows they are not taking no or I quit as an answer. So they get to be the bad guys.
He doesn't totally hate it though. They include enough fun activities that he still likes to go for that. We get a 2 week break now due to Thanksgiving.
Well, enough for the updates today. Will try harder for at least a weekly update...
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