I feel like life sucks at the moment. It's finally hit me mentally, and I just don't understand how or why some people can not want it, and do everything to avoid, and still end up pregnant.
I had a normal cycle. I had intense cramping and ovulation pains on day 12-13. A full 24 hours, maybe over. It's day 27 now. I had intense cramping last night, and a tiny bit of spotting this morning. My mood totally sucks, so I know it's a matter of hours, maybe a day or 2 at most before it all is over. I was really hoping that it would just work this month. Then I wouldn't have to go back and show that I failed at the weight loss part of this.
My appt is the 31st. I am 8lbs from the goal. I've been stuck for 4 weeks now. Actually, i'm up 2 from 3 weeks ago. I walk a lot, I'm constantly on the move with the kids around, I'm active. I just am stuck. It's extremely frustrating. And what else is frustrating is the fact that if I would have been able to just hold out till the week of the 31st for this freaking period to start, I could have started the clomid immediately. Instead, I'll probably end up stuck on provera and pure hormonal craziness. And headaches. Ugh.
So my mood sucks. I'm having a giant pity party and just can't get past all this.
My kid is also questioning again why he's an only child and all these other people keep having babies and their kids always have someone to play with. He loves the kids here during the day, and wishes they could stay all the time. Even though it gets loud and crazy and the godzilla baby comes and distroys his toy set up. He would be totally fine with that being a 100% all the time thing. He just wants someone else around. It's not fair.
I had a normal cycle. I had intense cramping and ovulation pains on day 12-13. A full 24 hours, maybe over. It's day 27 now. I had intense cramping last night, and a tiny bit of spotting this morning. My mood totally sucks, so I know it's a matter of hours, maybe a day or 2 at most before it all is over. I was really hoping that it would just work this month. Then I wouldn't have to go back and show that I failed at the weight loss part of this.
My appt is the 31st. I am 8lbs from the goal. I've been stuck for 4 weeks now. Actually, i'm up 2 from 3 weeks ago. I walk a lot, I'm constantly on the move with the kids around, I'm active. I just am stuck. It's extremely frustrating. And what else is frustrating is the fact that if I would have been able to just hold out till the week of the 31st for this freaking period to start, I could have started the clomid immediately. Instead, I'll probably end up stuck on provera and pure hormonal craziness. And headaches. Ugh.
So my mood sucks. I'm having a giant pity party and just can't get past all this.
My kid is also questioning again why he's an only child and all these other people keep having babies and their kids always have someone to play with. He loves the kids here during the day, and wishes they could stay all the time. Even though it gets loud and crazy and the godzilla baby comes and distroys his toy set up. He would be totally fine with that being a 100% all the time thing. He just wants someone else around. It's not fair.
I'm sorry. It's just not fair. And it sucks.
ReplyDeleteAnd you apparently have really bad luck, because you're friend is an urban legend. That's just weird.
It's especially disappointing when it seems that everything goes right during a cycle and it still fails. Those were the really low time for me.
It's probably hard dealing with K, but he needs to understand that families are all different and even if he doesn't have a sibling there are probably other things that he does have that makes his family special and another kid might be envious of. Maybe there's a way to put a positive spin on it like that?